Let Jeeves answer the questions..

Can I start by echoing Luke's request that you use the click-through ads around the site in order to bring in some cash to keep the best Scunthorpe United coverage on the Net going strong. It helps us if Mr. Thornhill is happy because he releases Patrick Hill and me from his basement dungeon to see the outside world for two, possibly three minutes at a time if he is cheery.

I was particularly taken with the Ask Jeeves advert. Every question you ask gives two pence to the site, so I decided to help Luke and expand my knowledge at the same time. I asked Jeeves why the sky is blue, he told me of the chemicals and the scientific processes within the eye. I asked who invented the internal combustion engine, he told me about Nikolaus Otto who performed the feat in 1876.

Finally, I asked Jeeves why Lawsy never substitutes Torps. Jeeves replied that he was ‘buggered if I know'. In fact, if you ask that question it brings up a link to a report of a Bristol City match involving our favourite ‘striker'.

The odd thing is that he was actually taken off in that game. You see, it has happened. It is scientifically possible. It feels a bit like an episode of the Twilight Zone, just set in Scunthorpe.

The Cardiff Twilight Zone is in production as well, it would seem. Cheltenham in the Second Division, I feel sick. I haven't seen a more cynically dirty team for a long while.

It will be so sweet when gravity takes hold and they plummet right past us as we move on up as Champions (you have to allow me a certain poetic justice here). Let's face it, with Julian Alsop weighing them down, they can't stick around at those heady heights for long. Can they? Perhaps Jeeves might know…

Up The Iron.

 

Jim can be heard weekdays on SBN Radio, weekdays between 2 and 7PM (across Student Radio Stations nationwide, www.sbn.co.uk and Sky Digital Channel 894)

His column can be read exclusivesly on Iron-Bru.net every Thursday